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July 29, 2024, 4:21 pm
Mostly lucky but somewhat wise/savvy:
#6 Green Bay: Go Pack Go
Do you think this team has been good for 100+ years because they don’t have an owner? Like, no billionaire with brain worms to make horrible decisions, a group of people calling the shots, and no one around to override them with sheer stupidity and greed? I think that might be it.
Oh the Green Bay Way, the patented model of long-term stability and peerless insight into producing HOF quarterbacks who go on to play with the Jets and then turn out to be right-wing grifters / cartoonishly evil people. No owner, no problem, these cheeseheads are always a step ahead of the curve, even though they’re just generally good most of the time and only win the Super Bowl roughly once every 15 years. But that’s good enough for them! I’d sign up for that right now, in blood, hell most fans would sell their souls for that kind of sustained run. Three quarterbacks since 1992, that’s it! Only the Steelers head coaching hires have that kind of success rate. Don’t get me started on Lombardi, Bart Starr, Curly Lambeau, Mike Holmgren, Reggie White…
You’d be hard-pressed to realize it, but secretly this team has been building towards 2025 this whole time. Surprise they are here now ready to win. Sorry Aaron, they weren’t prioritizing you and didn’t know you’d pull two MVPs out of your ass. This team has been prepping Jordan Love to get ready and to be ready. They’re paying no-name guys everywhere on the field to be actually productive when it counts. The Packers are just silently great from top to bottom, not making an uproar about it, dismissing the attention now that the world’s biggest attention hog is gone. Green Bay is just the Houston of the NFC, but with a real legacy and history behind them. Also, nice job replacing old man Aaron Jones with fresher legs in Josh Jacobs, he’s very good and the Raiders were wrong to get rid of him.
That being said, the drafting of Aaron Jones in the 5th as well as all the other no-name players has resulted in never being bad enough to warrant dismissal: Jamaal Williams in the 4th, Jaire Alexander in the 1st, MVS in the 5th, Rashan Gary in the 1st, AJ Dillon in the 2nd, Isaiah McDuffie in the 6th, Christian Watson in the 2nd, Romeo Doubs in the 4th, Lukas Van Ness in the 1st, Luke Musgrave in the 2nd, Jayden Reed in the 2nd, and whoever the hell they took this year who will turn out to be great a few years from now. Summing up their draft haul in recent years could be all about who they didn’t take but guess what fuckers, they won a playoff game and are hungry for more.
And of course, we must discuss the infamous Jordan Love trade-up. Looks fabulous today, but it seemed insane when it happened. And to the detriment of the team back then and Rodgers, taking a backup QB does not actively help your roster win football games at the moment (someone alert the Atlanta Falcons). That move only works for them, by the way, you cannot replicate it if you’re another team. Only the Packers get to take their successor and awkwardly bench him next to the starter because they are the Green Bay Packers. This is what happens, I don’t make the rules. Mark Murphy and Matt LaFleur see your memes and hot takes, and scoff, as they continue to steamroll people left and right.
Make all the jokes you want about them never taking a WR in the first round for Rodgers, or really any offensive help, the team won a playoff game against the vaunted Dallas Cowboys and should top the Detroit Lions for the NFC North crown soon, as is their god given birthright. And last time I checked, they have legit weapons too! Every time I do a fantasy mock draft, I keep seeing names ranked high like “Jayden Reed” and “Dontayvion Wicks” and “Bo Melton” and “Malik Heath.” Who the fuck are these people, why do I have to assume already that they’re good, and why the fuck can’t my Jets pull this effortless shit off and not just get Green Bay’s washed-up old detritus?
Shove your draft analysis up your ass, hold those L’s, because you can make fun of this team all you want but they’re honest, respectable, and competent, something 90% of the teams in this league just aren’t. The Packers always win. They’re winners, they know how to win, they will find a way to win and no one would be shocked if they won a Super Bowl in the Love era. Also, my Jets got swindled in that Rodgers deal. We bid against ourselves for no reason, coughed up too much even though he was only going to one team, and the only reason it wasn’t seen as being an awful deal was that the 1st converted to a 2nd (to our detriment, I would add).
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Smartest teams with recent rings to show for it:
1 – Chiefs
2 – Rams
3 – EaglesMostly lucky but somewhat wise/savvy:
4 – Ravens
5 – Texans